eating dirt. final chapter.

he has messed with me so much and doesn't even realize it. and if he does realize it, i don't think he cares. and if he doesn't, i don't think he would care if he knew. when someone says maybe, i keep it open.

"because you didn't want a relationship. something i wanted. so i stopped trying"

and i responded, "i can promise you that even thought i didn't want a relationship with anyone, you were the only one on my mind and the only one i was with. i have always tried with you."

i am selling my drums for $350 to him. the moment he walks out the door and drives off, i am deleting his number. i can't do this to myself anymore.