i am watching mad men. and writing. and thinking about writing.
i met with my creepy old history teacher yesterday. and he said that i am a good writer. and you know what, he is right. i am when i try. but i haven't tried for anything but school when it comes to writing in such a long time. i used to write poetry and short short clips for fun everyday. i was in honors and ap english. i got a 94% on my compass placement test for english. never have struggled until the past couple years. it was just like... i lost it. all of it. like every bit of creativity was sucked out of my body from a straw. and i still struggle. i dont do creative things for fun anymore. instead i just get anxiety from it. like painting or drawing. writing. sketching.
i lost my confidence in the things i loved.
and then i lost myself.
i have never been more confused on who i am in my entire life as much as i am at this point, right now.
and i think i need to devote the next six months to finding myself again. focusing on school. focusing on my passions that i have drifted from.
sounds like a solid idea, right?
because it's about time i start to do things for myself.
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